


She who will remain

by macgyvershe



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: AU, Angst, F/M, John's family, Marriage, Minor Character Death, Original Character(s), sherlock's family
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-19
Updated: 2014-12-19
Packaged: 2018-03-02 04:41:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,911
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2799956
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/macgyvershe/pseuds/macgyvershe
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>AU John finds love. John marries and gives Sherlock something he's never experienced...family life. Pear shaped health issues. John's son. Sherlock's nephew.</p>
            </blockquote>





	She who will remain

**Author's Note:**

> This was written quite a while ago. Major angst for those into that sort of thing. Extra helpings of fluff.

She had been just another one of John’s string of girl friends. They all came and went and left John a bit down; but unlike all the others she remained. Never annoyed by John’s constant comings and goings. When Sherlock called him out in the middle of the night, she supplied two hot thermos of tea, one with sugar for Sherlock and one without for John.

She was quiet, watched from a respectful distance with little comment unless she saw problems, never ever causing the least bit of upset and was as clever if not more so than John; really extraordinary. Shorter than John, her reddish-gold hair was shoulder length and curly, a constellation of freckles highlighted the bridge of her nose and fell down across her cheeks. She was almost child-like in her appearance, small hands and delicate features that shown with intelligence and mirth. Yet it was her eyes that were phenomenal, a misty sea green that haunted the senses. You could see the joy in those eyes when she looked upon John and John was so happy. Sherlock hadn’t seen him in such a state, ever. He practically floated around the rooms of the flat. He was constantly humming, bright eyed and unsettlingly happy and happier and happier still.

Nothing could deter his buoyancy and after a while, even Sherlock had to admit that she was good for John. Her name was Merra Harlan; orphaned as a child she had no family. Yet, she wasn’t clinging or coy. She was straight forward in her comportment; dressed well and behaved in a manner befitting a woman of intellect, wit and wisdom.

Though, at first, Sherlock had been skeptical of her, his mind changed over time as he came to rely upon her as much as John did. It was like having a PA for both John and Sherlock, helping with the mountains of paperwork that needed attention, even taking dictation on the fly directly from Sherlock or from his recorder. All reports that Sherlock provided to the authorities appeared on Lestrade’s desk in a timely manner. Often before cases closed.

With Merra, everything seemed to run so smoothly. Everything settled into a wonderful working order that even had Sherlock wondering how they had managed without her. Then it happened. John started calling Merra…Mama Bear. 

“It’s a term of endearment, Sherlock. Deal with it.” John flashed him a glare that would have melted stone and it did. Sherlock made no further mention of it.

Then out of the blue four months into their relationship, coming back to the flat, Mama Bear and John stood before Sherlock, hands intertwined. The grins on their faces were pure idiocy.

“Something has happened?” Sherlock ventured.”

John took a very deep breath, coughed, and cleared his throat.

“John,” Mama Bear said soothingly, “it’s okay, its Sherlock.”

“Sherlock, we would like you to be the first to know we are getting married and we’re pregnant.”

Sherlock’s mind raced in all directions. He was just now getting comfortable with the situation as it was. Now to have it all shot to hell with this notification.

“Congratulations, I believe are in order.” He said testing the waters. He stood and embraced them both. “I suppose you will be leaving now, to find a place of your own.” Sherlock felt a sudden discomfort.

“No, no old friend. We’ve talked to Mrs. Hudson and we are going to rent the basement flat.” John beamed at him, knowing that Sherlock would be rubbish without him.

“But the basement flat is unlivable, John.” Sherlock was skeptical.

“Come, come and see what we’ve done,” Mama Bear took Sherlock by the hand.

Mama Bear and John ushered Sherlock down to 221C, the basement flat that Mrs. Hudson had despaired of ever renting. John opened the door and Mama Bear pulled him in. The fireplace gave off waves of warmth and everywhere there were growing plants and rugs on the floor. Three comfy chairs encircled the enticing fire. The walls were clean and white, hung with photos and paintings. The living room definitely showed Merra’s touch. The kitchen was small but utilitarian and the two lovely bedrooms were Spartan but oh so comfortable. Just enough of a woman’s touch to let you know that love lived there.

“John, this is exceptional.” Sherlock was definitely amazed.

Then the thought hit him again.

“Pregnant, John we have to hire someone to help Mama Bear. She shouldn’t be expected to do as much as she has been.” Sherlock looked into the eyes of his dumb-founded friends.

John and Mama Bear exchanged looks and began laughing so hard they nearly fell down, escaping a fall by holding each other up.

It was then that Sherlock realized that he, too, had used John’s ‘term of endearment’.

“I’m sorry, John, it just came out.”

Mama Bear came over to Sherlock and hugged the tall genius in the room.

“No worries, Sherlock, you are part of our family. That will never change. You’re going to be “Uncle Sherlock” in a little while so I think you can call me Mama Bear. She beamed up at him.

It was true what they say about pregnant women. She positively glowed with life.

(-_-)

John loved Sherlock and by marrying Mama Bear, he gave Sherlock something he would never have had otherwise. Sherlock would have a family, an extended family that would love and cherish him and all his prickly attitudes.

(-_-)

It was a long and uneventful pregnancy. John constantly checked Merra throughout her pregnancy, more than Sherlock thought was necessary. It was a pleasure to have John and Mama Bear so close. Sherlock had converted John’s bedroom to his new lab. The kitchen became a kitchen again and food preparation happened both upstairs and in the basement apartment.

Of course, Mama Bear’s water broke as she and Sherlock were in the midst of wrapping up the paper work to a particularly sticky case.

Sherlock got Mama Bear to hospital in a timely manner. John arrived within minutes and four hours later John emerged from the inner rooms with a tiny bundle.

“Sherlock, I’d like you to meet my son, Sherlock John Watson.”

“John, do you think it wise to name your son after me? What will Merra say?”

“It was totally her idea.” John smiled with visible pride.

John handed the tiny bundle to Sherlock, who for once in his life looked totally perplexed.

“John, I have no experience with this type of human interaction, at all!”

Sherlock looked at the tiny child in his arms. He’d never been this close to an infant so small. He placed his index finger next to the unbelievable tiny hand. Sherlock Watson gripped the finger with his tiny fist. Sherlock was perfectly fascinated by his namesake.

“We’re planning to nickname him Locky so that there’s no mix-up with who we are talking to.”

“Locky Watson,” Sherlock tugged his finger, shaking hands with his new nephew, it would be a relationship, like his father’s, that would span Sherlock’s lifetime.

(-_-)

Six years rolled by so quickly that it was hard to comprehend the joy, fulfillment and satisfaction that everyone felt. Locky spent long hours transfixed with his Uncle Sherlock. Sherlock explained whatever he was working on at the time to his nephew, something he normally didn’t bother to do for anyone. When time permitted, Uncle Sherlock would take Locky out on walks to teach him about the city. The child had a great aptitude for learning and with a genius for an Uncle, he got as much stimulus as he could handle.

Everything seemed so perfect.

(-_-)

Sherlock’s mobile rang.

“Sherlock, when you and Locky are finished. Can you see if Mrs. Hudson will watch him for the evening?”

“Okay John, is there something wrong. Your voice sounds extremely stressed.”

“It’s Merra, Sherlock. We’re at hospital, it’s bad.” John’s voice broke and Sherlock felt his own heart ache in sympathy.

“I’ll be right there, John.”

Sherlock settled Locky with Mrs. Hudson and caught a cab to hospital. He met a distraught John.

“They are doing more tests. I’ve stepped out to find you, Sherlock.”

“What’s happened, John?”

“She told me when we met that she had a bad heart. She has been on organ transplant list since before we met. She was told not to get pregnant, was told she’d never carry to term, but she wanted a family so badly, Sherlock. We decided to go against conventional medical wisdom and we did okay. We have Locky now. We knew that any time that this would go pear-shaped and finally, it has happened, Sherlock.”

“Have you asked Mycroft to help you with this John?”

“He’s exhausted his resources, Sherlock. No matching donors have been found.”

They walk into her room. Monitors and tubes connect her to machines clicking and hissing in the claustrophobic space. She gives them both a tired smile.

“Hello, my beautiful boys.” She puts on a brave face. “Come sit with me.”

“Mama Bear,” Sherlock began, “why didn’t you tell me?” Looking at John. “How did I not deduce this?”

“Sherlock, we decided not to tell anyone. I didn’t want everyone to be walking on egg shells worried about me. I’ve a family now. John’s been so kind to give me a wonderful family: Locky and you, Sherlock. I have had a very fulfilling life. I’ve worked with the world’s greatest consulting detective and his equally famous assistant and blogger. I’ve helped you solve case after case from the comfort of my rocking chair. It has been a wonderful ride. Now I’m tired and I know they may not find a heart for me in time.”

John held her left hand and Sherlock took her right. 

“John will you bring Locky here. I need to tell him I’m going away. I don’t want to leave without him knowing how much I love him.”

“John, I’ll go and fetch him.” Sherlock was loath to leave, but he would not let Mama Bear down and he wouldn’t have Locky left so bereft without seeing his mother one last time.

It was getting late when Sherlock got back to the flat. Locky was still up and Sherlock bundled him up and carried him to the cab.

“I can walk, Uncle Sherlock.” Locky was surprised. Usually, Uncle was very good about giving his is freedom.

“We’ll move faster if I carry you,” Sherlock lied. He didn’t know what to say to the child. The whole situation was very upsetting. He felt holding the child was the best thing he could do now and he went with his instinct. The reality was he needed the closeness more than Locky.

At Mama Bear’s hospital room, they reunited. The monitors were off. Sherlock gave a questioning look at John.

“She wants them off. Doesn’t want to scare the boy.” John was being as brave as Mama Bear. 

“There’s my Locky. Can I have him, Sherlock? Why don’t you two get a cuppa and bring back hot cocoa for Locky and me?”

“Are you sure?” John asked.

“Its okay, John. Sherlock, you take good care of John for me.” 

Sherlock could see a sight change of coloring in Mama Bear. There was the tiniest hint of blue coming on, cyanosis. Her wonderful, victorious, loving heart was losing its battle to survive. 

Sherlock and John went in search of tea. Going on an empty elevator to the cafeteria, Sherlock put his arms around John and hugged him close. John broke down, tears flowing and sobs of grief finally rendering him heartbroken. Sherlock held him close.

“I have you, John,” Sherlock held him. He wished he knew what do to; his own feelings were in turmoil. Yes, Sherlock Holmes now had proper feelings and people he cared about and a family that he loved. Emotion and feelings flooded the Mind Palace. The loss that they would all have to share was crushing, the death in his loving family would devastate them all. 

When they stepped from the elevator, John had regained his composure. They purchased tea and cocoa and returned.

Locky lay upon his mother in the bed. His small arms were around her neck. John immediately set the cups down and rushed to Merra’s side. She looked at him one last time. “Good-bye formed on her lips, yet no sound was to be heard. Her smile radiant as she reached to touch his care worn face. Her hand dropped limply. He felt for a pulse, looked at Sherlock and shook his head in a negative sign. He lifted Locky from his mum.

“Here ya go my big boy. You come to your old Da.” 

“Da, Mama Bear has gone to be with Miss Kitten,” Locky said his own face tearless.

John looked at Sherlock. Miss Kitten was a small stray that Sherlock and Locky had found. She was not in good health and though they had taken her to a vet, in the end she had died. Sherlock had felt that this was a teachable moment and had the kitten cremated. Bringing the ashes back to Locky who buried the small packet underneath his mother’s favorite rose bush.

“Yes, love, she’s going to be with Miss Kitten,” John said hugging his son and crying softly as Locky hugged him back.

Sherlock looked at Mama Bear. He moved to her bedside and kissed her on the cheek for the very last time. “Good-bye, Mama Bear, my dear Merra.”

(-_-)

At the service, Sherlock rose to speak. Locky was asleep in his arms. It had been a very long day for him. He took Locky with him.

“There is so much to say about Merra Watson. Her name means a noble and trustworthy friend. She was that and so much more. If ever there was a name that suited a young woman, it was her name. She was beyond intelligent, a kind and noble person, but more than that she was the most loving human being that I have ever known. She who will remain in our hearts and minds for all time, her love will live on in Locky, John and myself.”

(-_-)

Locky was quiet, but not overly so. He went on doing little boy stuff and John and Sherlock marveled at his ability to adapt.

“John, he’s an exceptional child; he will grieve in his own way.” Sherlock said wisely.

(-_-)

Locky was sleeping with John for now. It was more for John’s comfort than Locky’s. He just felt better having the child close. Locky woke him up early that morning. 

“Da, can you wake up and help?” Locky had his little flashlight on. The child was an early riser but never usually bothered anyone about it.

“What is it son,” John was very mindful that something was amiss.

“It’s Uncle Sherlock. He’s not feeling well.”

Locky and John traversed the house to the stairs that lead to Sherlock’s flat.

Sherlock sat upon his bed, holding himself and leaning forward. He was trembling ever so slightly. 

“Sherlock, what’s happened?” John immediately went into doctor mode. 

“I’m okay, John, it’s probably withdrawal from the cigarettes. I keep getting the shakes.”

“We’re going to take care of you, Uncle Sherlock,” Locky looked to his father, “aren’t we Da?” He crawled up onto the bed close to his uncle.

“You’ve been off the cigarettes for a long time now, Sherlock,” John checked Sherlock’s vitals. 

“How long has this been happening,” John was very concerned, he’d never seen Sherlock ill in all the time he’d known him. He just figured that bacteria and virus’ were afraid to inhabit such an exotic creature as Sherlock Holmes.

“For a while now, John,” you could see him trying to pull himself together. 

“There doesn’t appear to be any fever or anything physical happening,” John said, “let’s lie you down and cover you up.”

Sherlock began trembling as John covered him. John had seen this before on the battlefield, he knew what was happening.

“Sherlock, I think that you are trying to process your grief.”

“John, I have seen death before.” Sherlock said as John propped him up with pillows and Locky laid his head on Sherlock’s shoulder.

“But you’ve never been emotionally involved,” John said sympathetically.

Sherlock looked into Locky’s misty sea green eyes. His mother’s eyes, the eyes that had looked upon Sherlock so briefly over a tiny span of years. He saw the love there, the love that would always be there. Something deep inside Sherlock shattered. His grief finally surfacing, tears flowed down his porcelain skin. As he hugged the small child to him, Locky hugged his uncle tightly and lay across his chest. 

So John held his best friend and Locky held his uncle, the one man that neither of them could imagine living without. They held him for a long time. 

“Locky, tell Uncle Sherlock what Mama Bear said to you before she went away.” John nodded toward his son.

“Mama Bear said she had to go away and I wanted to go with her, but she said I needed to stay here and look after you and Da; that you would need me more, Uncle.” 

Locky smiled a child’s innocent smile; touched with a wisdom that Sherlock had to acknowledge. 

They curled up together in bed with Sherlock and lucky for them, the tall man easily accommodated the smaller people who were now a part of his life and his ever-expanding heart.


End file.
